a reluctant, but optimistic, stay-at-home mom

I’ve made a switch: no more rushing kids to daycare before the 9am team meeting. No more leaving them crying at the daycare door because I can’t stay a few minutes to get them settled in. No more scrambling for childcare when one kid is sick and both of us have meetings we can’t cancel. No more yelling at Akka who won’t eat her breakfast and won’t put on her socks: “I don’t have time for this! Come ON”. No more paid work. I’m staying home.

No more feeling relevant and smart and engaged? No more sense of satisfaction from watching projects that I worked on actually get built? No more crazy-fun-busy days debating how this urban region should, could and will grow?

I arrived here, a stay-at-home mother of two, reluctantly. But I also can’t wait to dive into it. I’m an urban planner and I had a great job doing almost exactly what I wanted to be doing at this stage in my career. But the rushing was too hard and too stressful and not fun. A few months ago it dawned on me that while I can have it all, I can’t have it all at the same time. So it’s going to be kids now, and back to urban planning later.

And, it hasn’t even started yet. I’ve got 6 weeks of work left. Then it’ll be me, Akka and Malli all day, every day. Yikes.

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2 responses to “a reluctant, but optimistic, stay-at-home mom

  1. Pingback: kindergarten! « Chapter Four

  2. Pingback: growing food « Chapter Four

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